The art of body language

Dr Tareq Rasheed
International Consultant andTrainer 

Did you know that much of our communication is conveyed through facial expressions, gestures and posture and much less through actual words?

Communication can be verbal (using words through writing or speaking) or non-verbal (body language, voice, tune and appearance). Research shows that body language is responsible for transmitting 55 per cent of the message, 38 per cent of the voice and tone and only seven per cent is transmitted by words!

What is body language?

Body language refers to various forms of non-verbal communication. A person may reveal clues as to some unspoken intention or feeling through their physical behaviour: Posture, facial expressions, hand or leg movements or a mix of these. I imagine body language as a combination of thoughts and feelings reflected in the body through signs.

Body language can also clearly communicate negative emotions (fear, depression, anxiety, etc…). Both epinephrine and cortisol play a very powerful role in preparing us for physical and emotional challenges, increasing heart rate, sweating, pupil dilation and so on.

Eyes don’t lie

The eyes are frequently referred to as the “windows to the soul” since they can reveal a great deal about what a person is feeling or thinking.

As you engage in conversation with another person, take note of their eye movements. Some common things you may notice include whether people are making direct eye contact or averting their gaze, how often they are blinking, or if their pupils are dilated.

You may know that sunglasses were invented to block out sunrays. But did you know that Chinese judges first wore tinted eyewear in the 12th century to hide their eyes in court so that no one could read their facial expressions?

Signs of lying

See if the person in front of you bites his lip while talking to you. He may also lick his lips, which could also indicate a lie. This also applies to children. 

Other signs: 

•Covering their mouth, trying to hide their words

•Covering a parent’s eyes and telling them innocently do not look at me

•Speaking with downcast eyes 

Try asking someone you suspect of lying the “what, why, when, where, who and how” questions about the topic after one or two weeks have passed since the lie. You will then discover the truth!

Hand movements

Hand movements also tell us a lot about thoughts and feelings:

•Standing with arms over the stomach is feeling reserved and closed

•Speaking with two hands in the pockets; feeling so confident and sometimes being arrogant

•Speaking with one hand in one pocket; feeling stressed and worried

•Standing with an open chest and hands down; openness and ease of communication

•Leg movements while sitting means the person is feeling stressed

These interpretations apply to most cultures and only in 75 per cent of the cases, so we cannot generalise. Also, these signs are interpreted in situations such as lecturing, interviewing, negotiating and other similar situations. 

Tone of voice

Voice can reflect confidence, hesitancy, dishonesty, fear and other emotions. People tend to raise their voices in public, speaking to stress an important point or topic and tend to lower their voices to attract attention. This is very important to manage while giving a presentation or in public speaking.

Start noticing your body signs in different situations and try to manage and adapt!

Reprinted with permission from Family Flavours magazine